Canada, Eh

We had so much fun in Canada! We saw 3 days of amazing bands, many of which were on my "band bucket list."
It was gorgeous there in Pemberton, a valley nestled between so many huge mountains. There was snow! And it wasn't that far away from where we were. We got to hang out with a cousin, and meet so many new friends!
It felt like this was a bit of a "Babymoon" for us. Then I thought about it and realized we have had like 3 of those......first was Vegas in 2012, not long after starting to try. Then, San Diego later in 2012, because you know it was probably going to happen that month. And then Wisconsin in 2013, and now Canada 2014. Well I am lucky to take so many vacations pre-kids. Silver Lining?

And now I am in IVF-prep mode. I forgot/blocked from memory the huge pain in the ass (literally) IVF is. I have been on the phone for about 3 hours this week. Not kidding. It takes forever to get one clinic to send information to the new clinic, that was 4 phone calls, voicemails, returning calls, holding etc
Then, I was on the phone with the mail-order pharmacy for an HOUR. One call, 5 different people, and one annoying automated menu later, I will "hopefully, maybe if things go right" have my medications in time. Luckily I gave myself 4 days of wiggle room. I know how this works, they wait until the last minute but my Type-Aness will not stand for that!
I told them I started injections Aug. 8. In reality it will be closer to August 13. No big deal to them, huge stress reliever for me. Last time I got my medications delivered about 30 minutes before my first dose was scheduled. We are NOT having that again.

I am back to the uber-planning ahead of IVF too. As in, yes I would love to go see the fam. in late August. Oh wait- I could, maybe, potentially have a retrieval or transfer around that time. And even if I don't I could be too fat/tired/overstimulated to move off my couch. So no plans for me until Christmas. Because you never know.

I am doing much better this time around in taking care of my body and prepping. I did the cleanse, and I still take the supplements along with my regular ones (Vit. E, D, DHEA, CoQ10, and the prenatal). My friend says I have expensive pee. She's probably right. But better safe than sorry! I have plans to start meditating daily about the outcome I want. I can't decide to meditate on implantation, pregnancy, or having an actual take home baby......Open to suggestions on that one.

 I am also getting on "the wagon" this week, as in no more drinking until after the 2 week wait. Then I will either get super-drunk or stay on the wagon for a year! I have scheduled my first acupuncture appointment for next Friday. And I will have it hopefully again during the cycle, but for sure the day of transfer. S isn't a huge fan, and doesn't really believe in it. I do though, and I have read several studies supporting it's usefulness during IVF. Since this is our last shot at IVF, I'm pulling out all the stops! Eating well, light exercise, acupuncture, and massage have shown some slight benefit so it's happening.

I have some anxiety about my first ultrasound too. We are not doing BCP this time, and "going in hot" as my doctor says. Which is good since I am a "poor responder" but it could leave me with a cyst. In which case my cycle will be cancelled. That would lame.

Fingers Crossed everything goes well!

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Whew! I can stop and breathe finally!

Changes from A-Z in no particular order……….

A-M) We MOVED! To the COUNTRY! It’s AMAZING!

N) I am having surgery in a week in preparation for IVF in September

O) We are going on Vacation to CANADA in 2 weeks! And we just decided yesterday!

P) My grandma got really sick and was in ICU for a few days

Q) My mom was sick and in the hospital a day

R) Both are better and at their respective homes recovering

S) I have been doing a 6 WEEK(!) Cleanse! And it’s almost over!

I was going to go to Z but that was exhausting enough!

The quest for baby has been in a little bit of a holding pattern while we moved, made some big decisions, and marinated on those decisions. There has been progress just not the “reportable to the internet masses” type of progress.

But I MUST write about the Cleanse* I did/am doing.

It is from a company called Apex Energetics and it’s called the “Repair and Clear Program.” There are 3 phases over a 6-week period.

Week 1- Baseline Immune System Support: I OWNED this part! It was a great week of eat what I want, and take a lot of supplements that taste yummy.  The supplements are all delicious for this part.  It took me a couple days to get used to taking 5 things twice a day. I was getting up in “just enough” time to get ready and get to work, so I just started getting up 5 minutes earlier. It actually helped me get to work more consistently on time, added bonus. I felt like I had more energy this week, but no other changes.

Week 2 and 3-Intestinal Support Phase: Now things start to get a little tricky.....all of the sudden I was cut off! No Caffeine, Sugar, Grains, Gluten, Dairy, Alcohol, all things processed, and all things delicious. Ok, I *might* be slightly dramatic……

The main things that changed for me was coffee (I only drank 1.5 cups a day anyways), and rice. Turns out I missed rice way more than it missed me. These 2 weeks have 6 supplements twice a day, 3 liquid, 1 powder, 2 vitamin pills and 2 probiotic pills. The powder for this part, Repairvite, was NOT delicious. It was weird though after like 9 days I liked it. I feel like my taste buds abandoned me.

There were some seriously HANGRY moments for the first few days of this. I woke up on day 3 of this phase and I would have sworn I was getting strep throat. My lymph nodes in my neck were swollen and hurt really bad. I was coughing; feeling low, no energy, grumpy, and I wanted to crawl out of my skin. I think my body was really and truly detoxing. It took forever!

Day 6 I was at home alone all day. Not such a good idea. I had nothing to eat, I was bored, restless, hungry, and crawling out of my skin. I texted with my friend and Support Person (SP) (Couldn’t have done this without her!) and then went for a run. It was GLORIOUS! It was exactly what I needed. I was no longer hungry, bored, or restless. And my lymph nodes quit hurting by the next morning.

That’s when my SP shared the super awesome “Cleanse Cheats” that saved my life. They weren’t even technically illegal making them all the better. Terra Chips, Avocado, Kombucha, Zevia. The meal/snacks made me so ridiculously happy.

Terra chips are just baked root veggies and salt. Yeah and they rock. Put a little homemade guacamole (no tomatoes on the Cleanse) on them and AH-MAZING!

I have historically not been a Kombucha fan. I try it every few months hoping to like it, but so far no dice. I gave it another shot and tried a Cranberry flavor. I haven’t decided if I liked it because of the flavor, or because for once the Kombucha had no “competition” with other sugars and flavors……Food for thought.

Zevia is not something I would ordinarily consume. It is soda, but “All natural”- No sugar, artificial things, etc. It is sweetened with Stevia. I drank the Ginger Root Beer and Cream Soda the most because they were delicious and no caffeine. (Costco has the variety pack) When I am off the Cleanse I want to try the caffeinated one which is just regular soda.

I LOVED my “treats.” I wouldn’t have made it without them. And now I have a visceral, affective understanding of how dopamine and serotonin work in the brain. I could feel the chemicals in my brain release when I had the thought of “cheating.” It wasn’t really cheating, but my brain thought it was so it worked.

I did have a couple for real cheats during these 2 weeks. We had kickball playoffs so I had a few beers with the team. I think there was another day I had a couple drinks too. Anyways, other than that I was on point! I had more energy, felt awesome in the tummy department, and didn’t even miss anything, I really found a groove!

Week 4-First week of Liver Support Phase: ENTER RICE AND BEANS!! YES! My life is complete! I can have all the rice and beans I want, and I basically ate them at every meal. It was glorious. Turns out I eat very similar to this on a regular basis. So no big deal!

Week 5-Second week of Liver Support Phase: FML! NO MEAT! I was compensating for the lack of rice/beans/variety in my diet the first few weeks by eating more meat. I usually don’t eat meat at every meal, usually once a day at dinner. They took my meat away, and I rebelled. I did not do so hot this week. There was some meat happening……..Just fish though….that is a little better right??? Right??? Validate me?????

Week 6- Third and FINAL WEEK!: Yeah I’m over it.

Seriously I had a serious cheat day/weekend at the beginning of the week. But, in my defense we had a swim party at the new house and my close friend made Pasta Salad. It’s so good, it’s famous. It would have been rude to not eat it. (I could keep the rationalizations going if you want……) But for real, I think I hit a wall of just being over it. I have not been craving caffeine at all during this until yesterday. 3 days into week 6. (I just had a little tiny cup of coffee and no dairy)

I had a lots of extra stressors the past week or so; I have been emotionally and physically tired. This probably has less to do with the Cleanse, and more to do with life. I have noticed I went from taking a Zertec-D every single day to none during this time and I have not had allergy problems at all! People are suffering from mold, and some sort of dust that is blowing in from the Gulf. I have no symptoms! Seriously I am the allergy queen! It is so liberating!!!!! Also in TMI news- my BM’s have been awesome! But I won’t gross you out with the deets on that.

I struggle sometimes with being a perfectionist, so I was disappointed in the times that I cheated. It did make me feel better that my SP (who was doing it too but a week ahead of me) also had some cheats. I feel good about how I am going so far, and I have 4 days left!!!!! Home stretch!!!

Overall, I think doing the Cleanse has been a very positive thing. I was forced to take an honest look at the foods/drinks I craved and figure out what was going on. Food/eating is an enormous comfort and endorphin releasing thing/event to me. I also lost a few pounds, and learned I can have some self-control.

I really and truly could not have done it without my husband. He took over grocery shopping and cooking for me. He even ate what I ate for dinners. He took such care to not eat anything in front of me I couldn’t eat, and made sure I had lunches for work. There were multiple times I wanted to cheat, but he pushed me back on track and made me remember my commitment to the Cleanse. It made me appreciate and love him even more than I already did (which I didn’t think was possible!)

I also couldn’t have done it without my friend and SP. We texted almost daily the entire time, I really felt she encouraged me and gave me creative ideas to make it work and work well. I don’t know what I would have done without Terra chips and Zevia!

I wanted to do the Cleanse to prepare my body for the assault of medications that is about to come. I feel “cleaned out” and ready to go! Bring it IVF! J

If you are still reading this, you probably need a hobby. But if you are interested in the Cleanse let me know, I can hook you up!